I love romantasy. I adore the yearning, the action, and the imagined worlds. I was reading it before it became romantasy and one of the biggest selling genres in fiction.
But…
(oh, you knew there was going to be a but)
Have you noticed how many romantasy protagonists in recent releases suffer from self-loathing?
I was shocked when I realised that the emotional driver for the book I was reading was the hero and heroine’s mutual rescue of each other from self-loathing.
Once I put the cause of their angst into words — “I hate myself. I’m despicable. Nobody could love me.” — I realised that the previous romantasy I’d read had a similar vibe, although it only had one protagonist drowning in self-loathing and the other hauling them out.
What concerned me was that this is the emotion that resonates with readers. I love a good rescue story as much as anyone (I eat up Cinderella stories, although not as much as Beauty and the Beast ones). However, waiting for someone to love you so that you can love yourself is perilous.
To quote Maya Angelou, “You alone are enough.”
As soon as I started thinking about romantasy that featured this empowering vibe I came up with When Demons Walk by Patricia Briggs. Also Bride of the Rat God by Barbara Hambly and A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik (the third book in the Scholomance trilogy didn’t work for me, but I happily read and re-read the first two). Neverthorn by Shannon Mayer is out today, and since her protagonists never wait around to be rescued I’m really looking forward to it (plus, dark academia! I love it).
What fantasy books would you suggest with strong characters, powerful conflicts, and a happy ever after?
Comments
8 responses to “Problematic Romantasy”
Ilona Andrews Kate Daniels series and off shoot from that-Iron Covenant
Fantastic books! I love Kate. And I just finished re-reading Nevada’s trilogy (Burn For Me). I’m hoping their latest serial is released as a book soon. Maggie the Undying in March 2026 is such a long way away.
I enjoyed The Fairy Godmother by Mercedes Lackey. I also liked her YA trilogy that started with Hunter. Good strong leads, lessons learned without endless angst, really interesting world building, and the stories felt fresh even when the framework is done often. I’m with you on that self loathing business. I like a good redemption story as much as the next person but I really like it when they rescue themselves because they realize there is a better way. Counting down to Hexes!
Yes!!!
I love those books you rec’d! And Kate Daniels and Nevada/Rogan (I should re-read that trilogy, it has been so long)!
For me, the most common problematic romantasy is the body betrayal trope – basically, MMC is a total jerk, and FMC lets him get away with it because she’s so attracted to him. It’s not a good look, and imo it normalizes abusive relationships (it’s a thing I’m particularly sensitive too, as I’ve done a lot of volunteering with domestic abuse shelters). The notion that he will change and love you like you deserve if you just hang in there long enough is incredibly dangerous.
But I never thought about the self-loathing that you’re describing in your post, and yeah, that’s a very sad thing to internalize. Or a sad statement of what folks resonate with. 🙁
Have you read Hailey Edwards The Beginners Guide to Necromancy series? I just recently re-read that, and I feel like it has a wonderfully strong FMC (who is recovering from an ordeal as the series kicks off) who pulls the MMC out of that kind of “no one would ever love me” funk. Other ones I can think of:
– Anne Bishop’s Others series also has that, though it’s not really romantasy – there is love, but it stays very formative as the FMC really works to understand and empower herself.
-T.A. White’s Firebird series, which has wonderfully strong characters that grow together, rather than need a rescue (a space opera romantasy)
– K.N. Baney’s Jacky Leon series … mmm, I should re-read that one too
– Patricia Brigg’s Raven duology, which I re-read in January. I had forgotten that series, and man, it is so good.
You just listed some of my favourite authors! I struggled initially with the cutting (self-harm) in Written in Red by Anne Bishop but it’s handled well. Compassionately. And like you said, Meg’s growth is empowering. I like the Lakeside series for that, too.
And I know you didn’t mention volunteering at shelters to be thanked for it – but thank you. Sincerely and deeply.
Yay, I love all those authors!
And yes, the self-harm with Meg can be tricky to navigate, but I feel like it was done in a respectful way, particularly with the way it functioned with her power. I think if the series started like 6 months earlier, and we had to see Meg living in those facilities and being used for prophecies, I wouldn’t have had the stomach for it (as it was, hearing about those facilities was difficult enough). But focusing on her road to recovery, as well as trailblazing a different way to work with her power that could help all the other blood prophets, was so great. And I appreciated that, while Simon and the others were helpful to Meg, it was mostly in giving her different perspectives. Meg saved herself, while they helped to keep her environment safe. It was lovely all around.
And <3. I only mention it sometimes because I know that my sensitivities to the body betrayal trope are probably a lot more dialed up than most people – I try to mention it in reviews, because I know I come down harder on it than most others would, so I want them to take my review in that context, in the interest of fairness.
I forgot to mention earlier – I hadn’t heard it called the body betrayal trope and it’s such an apt description. Thanks!